By Karl Lausman | June 1, 2026

For over 25 years, I’ve lived with schizoaffective disorder and generalized anxiety. There have been long stretches where the illness felt like it was running the show—especially during a major psychotic breakdown that lasted roughly from 2008 to 2018. But one of the strangest and most powerful gifts hidden inside that chaos was an unrelenting drive to learn business.

During the height of my delusions, I became convinced I was destined to manage enormous sums of money. These weren’t passing thoughts. They were vivid, all-consuming beliefs that shaped my every waking hour. Instead of letting them destroy me, I leaned into them. I started reading and studying everything I could about business, investing, leadership, and wealth-building from the world’s most successful people.

That decade of “crazy” became my greatest classroom.

The Delusion That Became Discipline

I remember days when symptoms were at their worst—racing thoughts, paranoia, the works—yet I’d still force myself to sit down with books, articles, or whatever material I could get my hands on. Warren Buffett’s letters to Berkshire Hathaway shareholders. Biographies of Rockefeller, Carnegie, and modern titans. Books on value investing, operations, marketing, negotiation, and scaling businesses.

I didn’t just skim. I studied like my future depended on it—because in my mind, it did.

Even on disability income, which was modest at best, I applied what I learned. I lived frugally, avoided lifestyle creep, and slowly built positions in the stock market. What started as small, careful investments grew into a substantial portfolio through consistent learning, patience, and compounding. Those early delusions about managing “large amounts of money” never materialized in the way my mind imagined, but the skills I gained absolutely did.

Today, those same principles guide every business decision I make. Whether it’s managing my power washing business, evaluating opportunities, or simply handling day-to-day finances, the foundation I built during my hardest years pays dividends daily.

What Psychosis Taught Me About Business

1. Obsessive Learning Pays Off
When your brain won’t stop, channel it. I turned sleepless nights and racing thoughts into deep study sessions. That intensity helped me absorb complex topics faster than I ever could in “normal” times.

2. Discipline Through Chaos
Working while going crazy every day built unbreakable habits. Showing up consistently when you feel terrible is one of the most valuable skills in business (and life). Markets don’t care about your symptoms, and neither do customers.

3. Long-Term Thinking
Psychosis forced me to confront uncertainty. Investing taught me the same lesson: patience and compounding create real wealth. I learned to ignore short-term noise and focus on intrinsic value.

4. Resourcefulness on Limited Means
Starting with disability income meant I had to be extremely creative and disciplined. That mindset is pure gold in entrepreneurship.

Linking It All Together

This journey didn’t happen in isolation. I’ve written before about hitting rock bottom and still fighting every day. If you’re in a similar place, that post might resonate: How I Hit Rock Bottom with Schizoaffective Disorder – And Why I Still Fight Every Single Day.

I’ve also shared how powerful delusions shaped a long period of my life and how finding the right environment helped me begin true recovery: Finding Where You Fit.

And on the harder days when motivation feels impossible: Some Days Are Hard.

The Takeaway

My psychosis didn’t just “happen to me.” In many ways, it pushed me toward skills that now serve me every single day. The delusions were painful and disorienting, but they lit a fire for learning that I still carry.

If you’re living with mental illness and feel like it’s stealing your potential, consider this: sometimes the very thing that feels like your biggest obstacle can become the fuel for your greatest strengths. Channel the intensity. Study relentlessly. Show up even when it hurts.

God never gives us more than we can handle. Keep going, stay positive, and turn your pain into preparation.

I’d love to hear how you’ve turned challenges into strengths in the comments.

Stay resilient,

Karl Lausman

karllausman.com